Paul's Dirty, My Hole, and Jim's Big Day

So, September 21st saw Paul's Dirty Enduro...a 100 kilometre Mountain Bike Race (There are also shorter options of 35km and 65km).  Paul's is a Mountain Bike Race held in memory of Paul, a local Mountain Bike enthusiast, to raise money for Mental Health (actually the origin is quite a story...google it to get the whole deal). 

I was registered for the race, but of course, until I heal, recover, and can put my big boy pants on again I am not able to ride.  However, I had talked quite a crew to join me on this sufferage.  Why sufferage?  Paul's is one of the toughest races of the year.  Part of it is the distance...but most of it is the location.  Held in Ganaraska forest...the combination of hills and sand (extreme sand!!) make the course especially gruelling!  Throw in an overabundance of poison ivy, and the fact that September weather can be challenging (foreshadowing anyone???), and you are in for a story from any racer who makes the attempt. 

Anyways, as I had mentioned, my injury kept me from attending...however Jaimie and HydroPaul headed up mid day on the 20th to set up camp and avoid traffic (these guys is smart!...Mooore foreshadowing???).

 

 

Bad foreshadowing...

 

Good foreshadowing...

 

 

 

 

 

 

Anyways...the rest of the crew...Fig, EnglishJim, Giant piled into NewfieSteve's truck...but not until about 9pm. Apparently Steve had to work late (to facilitate buying a new home, support two families in Rawanda, and keep us all from believing he is a Newfie).  So they didn't get there until about midnight...so not only did they have to set up camp in the dark...but....hold on....it had also started raining. 

 

 

Sooo...here is where the foreshadowing thing plays out...the race starts at 8am...it's still raining (it rained ALL day).  What happens when rain, sand, and dirt mix???  The worst kind of gummy, mucky, sticky, grindy, grindy, grindy mixture of energy sucking, momentum stopping, pivot and seal eating, brake pad burning goo!!  Seriously!!  Here is how it went down.. 

Sooo, after a 3 hour midnight drive, camping in the rain, 5 kilometres into the race EnglishJim slides on a gooey descent, goes over the bars, smokes a tree and destroys his brakes (broke the master cylinder)...he is done...minutes into the race.  Beer time...but still, Mr. Jim was not too happy...

I'm thinkin he kinda looked like these guys...

 

 

Sorry...Jim likes the cat pics... 

At the 40 km mark, and 4 hours later (the conditions made progress brutally slow), Fig and NewfieSteve had to to bail...with no brakes.  This is how Steve's brake pads looked post race.

 

Seriously...worn right to the metal... 

These are the brake pads of the fella who won the race.  Very similar to Steve's...again worn through the metal backing...

 

 

His brakes failed at the 50 km mark, so he used his shoe on his back wheel for the remainder of the race to slow himself down...this is his shoe...

 

 

 

Many riders DNF'd due to mechanicals caused by conditions.  Most who soldiered on were pulled at the 75km mark due to the time (including Jaimie, HydroPaul, and Giant).  There were 47 riders in the 100km race...6 completed and finished it.  Huge Kudo's to all that attempted it. 

Wonder how the boys will feel about doing it next year??

 

As far as an update on my recovery...I had the packing removed this week, and wala!!  It did not need to be repacked!!  The infection is almost completely gone, the muscle tear and soft tissue damage is healing...which is all good news, but still a ways to go.  Also, I still have a quarter sized hole in the skin and flesh of my leg that needs to heal up.  I do have pics but they are gross (imagine a deep gunshot wound...that is what it looks like), so not a good idea to post them. 

I am hoping to begin to get some minimum activity (light work on the trainer...weight work outs??) by next week...then gradually ramp it up.  I just cannot push it too hard, or do anything that would have any possibility of falling on it.  That would completely undo all of the benefit that rest has provided.  And the rest and inactivity is darn near painful in itself, so I don't want to have to extend it to any longer than I have to! 

The Fall Epic8 Hour MTB race is this Saturday (Sept 28th)...and the whole crew is headed up to participate.  There is a bit of a catch though.  This is the third race in a series of three (Spring Epic8, Summer Epic8, and Fall).  Team DaNoofie N DaNative (Steve and me) are currently in second in the series in the two man team category after the first two races...so we have a chance depending on how we do in the Fall8.  I, of course, cannot ride...and we can't substitute...I will be there to help out and support, however Steve is bravely going to solo the race as our team.  Should be worthy of a good story!!  Steve's chance to be the superhero!!!  (SuperNewf???)

 

 

 

Actually this is my favourite superhero pic...

 

 

 

 

OK...back on track, and on a final note, it is EnglishJim's birthday this weekend (Shhhh don't tell him...I don't think he knows!).  I think he is like, 85 or something.  He still thinks, he looks like this though...

 

 

 

I am not sure what to get him...although I think this would be his dream girl...

 

 

 

 

Sorry Jim...what are friends for...

 

 

 

Ah well...that is enough for now...we will see how this weekend goes...

 

Should make for a good blog!! 

Stay posted!

 

 

 

Garden City Classic and my Vastus Lateralis

So as far as mountain biking goes, it has been almost 3 entire weeks of me doing a whole lot of nothing...which is great for bulking up my mid section...and healing my wound...but mentally driving me batty...

 

Yeah...I wish...

 

As far as mountain biking goes I did manage to volunteer at the race I was scheduled to race in this last weekend (Sept 15th)...Short Hill's Cycling Club's Garden City Classic.  

 

 

 

 

I manned the registration desk, then worked with the timing tent (I operated the bull horn to call out racers plate numbers as they crossed the line as a back-up to the timing system).  See...this is me in the background with the bullhorn...

 

 

 

 

Regarding the race course itself, I was told by racers that it was a lot of tight twisty single track...which many mtb'ers love...but not me so much.  Give me roots, rocks, hills, and at least 50kms in distance and I am in my element.  However, tight, twisty stuff just slows me down...so I need practise at this stuff, once I can get on a bike again. 

Regarding the organisation of the race, it went without a noticeable hitch...it was very well run...especially considering this was an inaugural event...it looked to be great fun, cool prizes, and food.  

 

The start line...

 

 

 

Kudo's should go out to the SHCC, and especially to the race director TheDumbOpinion (his nickname is Jeff) for a great job.  However, TDO looked on the edge of a breakdown the whole time...I don't think he cracked nary a smile the whole day...kinda reminded me of this guy...

 

 

...so if you see TDO, ask him to smile...cuz he deserves it. 

Anyways, CptSydor, and his significant other VVagabond (who coined the term 'significant other' anyways...what is it really??  Do people have insignificant others???) also volunteered at the race.  VVagabond worked the reg desk, and timing tent with me, and CptSydor swept. 

Actually CptSydor, and VVagabond raced in a 6 hour race in Woodstock the day before (that would be Sept 14), and they each won!!  

 

 

 

 

 

So hats off to them (another colloquial saying?).  If you want to be great, hang out with those that are...so that's what I was doing.

 

 

 

Unfortunately I wont be able to do so this weekend.  My injury will be keeping me from attending Paul's Dirty Enduro...the race I was scheduled to be in.  The 3 hour drive up, and the two nights of tenting are not conducive to my injury healing.  EnglishJim, Giant, NewfieSteve,Fig, Jaimie, and HydroPaul will all be there, so I wish them well...and look forward to the race reports and stories when they get back.

 

 

 I feel somewhat sorry for the guys that get stuck seeing EnglishJim changing in public...

 

 

 

 

 

As far as an injury update...I have had the wound repacked twice this week...which hurts a little more each time as it heals.  The torn muscle is repairing...all is going to schedule...which is still too slow for my liking.  If I could go back in time...

 

 

 

 

Anyways I just need to get back at it, being active...before I weigh 250 lbs, and get so out of shape I make Fig look fast.  Actually I have been doing fairly well watching my nutrition intake...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I am getting in upper body workouts...just to keep the torso toned...and to be able to do something other than warm the couch (and day job).  Besides...Lois prefers that I look like a man...not a 12 year old boy...so upper body work helps.  However the MTB related muscles are stagnant, and are really going to need some work as soon as I am able.  So looking forward to it.

 

 

 

 

Anyways enough whining...

 

 

 

 

 

That's all I got for now anyways, so until I have some Paul's Dirty Enduro stories to share...

Stay posted!

 

 

Update on Riot's Explosive Situation

So...just a brief update (no nothing to do with my underwear), on my medical condition...and to answer a couple of questions people had about the injury (see my last blog post). 

"What is the vastus lateralis?" - What??  You don't have Google??  Anyways, it is one of the quad muscles...it's the outside one. 

"What exactly is a HUGE tear?" (Yes, this was asked by an engineer) - In my case the tear is 16cm x 4.4cm x 6.3cm.  (To the person that asked the question...ask your spouse, I am sure she/he would consider that enormous.) 

"How would you not know you had a torn muscle?" - According to Lois I am rather insensitive on occasion.  According to the doctors I am dangerously insensitive when it comes to  recognizing pain...and this has caused me medical problems in the past. 

"What is the wing speed of the South African Sparrow?" - What???  Get outta here!

 

 

 

Not really sure what that is all about...but EnglishJim likes the cat pics...

 

Anyways...as far as the update goes...when we last left our glorious story, I was dealing with the huge hematoma as a result of the untreated muscle tear.  The doctors prescribed ice, rest, Tylenol, and to consult with a physiotherapist to make sure the muscle heals with minimal scarring.

 

My hematoma didn't quite look like this...but close...

 

 

So rest I did (and am), ice I did (supposed to be for 15 minutes at a time but I applied for 40 minutes to an hour at a time attempting to get the hematoma to shrink faster), and booked an appointment with a physiotherapist. 

So at the physiotherapist, a couple of days later...once his jaw came up from the floor upon seeing the hematoma...he said that "Not much we can do until we get that hematoma under control...and regardless of what the doc said, it looks infected, it looks inflamed...and you have given yourself serious frostbite from overicing, so now the skin is damaged."  

Well...just great...but I soon had proof that he knew what he was talking about.  That night as I was talking to my ma on the phone, I felt something wet running down my leg (no, although I am old, that is not something I commonly experience)...and looked down to see a milky line running down my shin (again, no not a normal thing)... 

So, a mad dash to the bathroom, where I whipped my pants down (stop it!!), just in time, as the hematoma that had just started leaking burst open, and gushed its contents into the world.  Yes it was infected, yes it was inflamed, and the release of the pressure build up felt amazing...other than the torn muscle, I had mobility in the leg again.

 

At least it wasn't quite like this...

 

 

 

 

Or this...

 

This one is for EnglishJim....

 

 

 

 

 

This one makes no sense...I just think it's funny...

 

 

 

 

 

Anyways, to make a long epochal saga of a story (see what I did there?) just a bit longer, the next day I called the doc to see where I should go from here...was I ok to leave this as is...it was still draining some..etc.  Apparently, a hematoma breaking is a rather bad thing...so a rush to the doc.  The opening in my skin was about the size of a quarter (yeah, I know, gross...sorry...I didn't make the story...I'm just telling it...???)...(and why is Fig strangely excited by this???) 

 

Coulda been worse...

 

 

 

 

Anyways, the doc and nurse stuffed the wound with medicated gauze (yes...does not feel nice at all), in order for it to heal from the inside out.  And I will have to return regularly (twice per week) to have this packing replaced (oh yay...).  I am also, once again, on antibiotics.  However, now that this is taken care of, I can focus on repairing the muscle (still a 4-6 wk process), then hopefully get back to training.  (Also, now that I am somewhat mobile I can properly get back to my day job!).  As it is, I am volunteering, working the registration desk at the race I was scheduled to race in this weekend;  Short Hills Cycling Club's Garden City Classic.

 

Also...a couple of great new sufferlandria videos are out this weekend!!  I will tell you what makes them great on a future post, and keep you up to date on my recovery...and whatever the hell else comes to mind. 

Stay posted!

 

Riot - Out for the Count? (Or just the season...)

So, apparently my dreams of being recruited by Team BMC, or US Postal, or Garmin Sharp, before the end of the racing season are over.

 

 

 

No, not because I am irrelephant...ok, maybe that's why, but that's not what I was getting at.  If you look back at my posting titled Riot Down (July 6 I think), on June 25th I took a nasty crash resulting in this ...

 

 

At the time, I thought it was just a bruise...apparently it was more than that...

After 2 months of riding and racing I woke up to a huge swelling in the outside of the hip...it was literally like an angry red cantaloupe sticking out of my hip, like I was wearing a pair of RCMP riding pants!

 

 

I am sure you would have preferred I looked like these riding pants...

 

 

 

I wont put an actual pic up...no one wants to see a 50 year old half naked man with an spicy red goitre extending from his hip, ready for a carnivorous alien fetus to explode from it! 

Anyways, a trip to the doctor had them first diagnose it as soft tissue infection from repeated trauma (falling on it too many times...yes I have crashed alot this year...), prescribed an antibiotic, but also scheduled scans just to be sure. 

So after the scans, and a return trip to the doctors office (not only to review the scans, but because the antibiotics were ineffective), they showed me the radiologists report..."The patient has a HUGE tear in the right vastus lateralis that is bleeding into the hip pocket".  So, that explained the searing burn, and the large red swelling.  A consultation with an orthopedic surgeon has the treatment as rest, ice, Tylenol, and 4 - 6 weeks off the bike.  Means my race season is done...damn!!  But I need to let this heal properly... 

On a happier note, my last ride was the inaugural Margaret ride.  CptSydor, VVagabond, EnglishJim, Fig, and Giant joined me for a ride on the local trails...and ended up at my house for food and beverages.  My mother, Margaret Riot, is visiting from Saskatchewan, and it was her 75th birthday, so it ended up as a bit of a birthday party, as other friends showed up as well.

 

 

Ma didn't get too out of hand for a change...

 

 

 

And she got a couple of unexpected presents...

 

 

 

 

 

And luckily for us all, EnglishJim did not get naked...

 

 

 

Fig got drunk and wanted to fight...

 

Actually as per usual...he was just confused...

Anyways...(sorry about all the cat pics...EnglishJim loves them!!), I sit here typing, with ice applied...ruing the great upcoming races I will be missing.  I kinda feel like this guy...

I guess I will have to get in some upper body workouts so I don't end up looking like this...

I will still likely attend the races...either to volunteer, if possible, or to be the 'pit bitch' to help my racing friends.

 

Either way...I will keep you posted!